International News - January 31st, 2012

This is the first post of the Earth 2 International News blog.

Today's breaking news:

A battle has broken out in Lolscow and is currently raging on at this time. SpetsLOLz, as well as VietLOL's leader EmergencyRanger88 and the USSR's leader Pieboy6000 are fighting off LOL-Qaeda after they have attempted to kidnap EmergencyRanger88 a second time. This may have devastating effects for IROFLaq during this wartime situation, as the War in Southeast LOLsia is still going on. If you are in Lolscow, you are advised to remain indoors until the all-clear is given.

Today's major news:

The United Speakonian Soviet Republic and IreLOL have funded the VietLOLese weapon "The Bunker Annihilator", the strongest non-nuclear weapon on Earth 2 at this time. It was completed today and tested on an island 20 kilometres off the coast of VietLOL.

A small island owned by strange pony-like beings was the testing ground for the previously mentioned weapon. The island was utterly annihilated, the weapon living up to it's name, and more, and left smaller islands dotted around. These islands were quickly invaded and taken over by the USSR, VietLOL and IreLOL. The Northern and Western islands were taken by the USSR, and are known as "Remote Islands of the USSR", the Eastern islands were taken by IreLOL and is known as the "Freedom Islands", and the Southern islands were taken by the VietLOLese. All the survivors who lived on the island were executed by the men who took over shortly after. The UL has not charged the nations with war crimes.

The NoAGK24 tower was invaded by the USSR and Vietlol today. NoAGK24 was convicted of plagiarism and ban evading. He was sentenced to death later that day and executed. The command was given by the Speakonian Republic to the USSR, allowing them to use their space fighters to destroy the NoAGK24 space station. Looking up at around 1am (GMT +0) should give you a nice view of the pieces as they burn up in atmosphere.

Yesterday, in the USSR, an elite task force moved into a safehouse with many people, including Pieboy6000, EASlol, Natesworld2k, and EmergencyRanger88. As they moved in, they discovered Scottyvich Baloneykov, a man who was discharged from the SpetsLOLz in 2006 was there. He was tied up and executed gorily with a gunshot to the head by Pieboy6000's golden desert eagle, blowing most of his head away. Is this the end of mass terrorism on Earth 2? Maybe it is.

Other news:

XtranormalGeek, otherwise known as SMG, has launched his space station to join the many others above, including the Thunderbirds101 space station, the oldest orbiting Earth 2 to date, this is the first space program for IROFLan.

Pepsi Co. has overtaken Coca CoLOL as the leading cola brand on Earth 2.

The IROFLan presidential election has started. If you are in IROFLan, we strongly advise you to vote for XtranormalGeek again! He has been a good president so far! Do NOT vote for TheDaxter5151 as he is an imposter of another good man!

The United LOLs of ROFLica has accidentally lent to much money out and is trying to pull it back. There is a good chance we may fall into a global recession, however, President Microsoft Sam has claimed that he will resolve this problem as soon as possible. However, the massive amount of military spending may be dooming some countries to their own recessions, such as IROFLaq.

Please stay tuned to the Earth 2 International News blog for further updates regarding world news, situations, and other events. See you next time!